Sunday. Instead of hanging with the beautiful people in Napa valley, I head to the football kickoff party at Maggie and Jeff's place.
Team owners only. League of Intrigue (LOIN) and I-5 Fantasy Football League (IFFL.)
I was all proud of myself for getting up early after a night of drinking and heading to the gym. I had a great six mile run.
Picked up some chips and salad and sugar-free Mike's Hard Lemonade and head to Magnolia.
Feeling good about myself... right up until I opened one of those god awful lemonades, sat down on the deck and POP!
A fucking support beam broke right under my ass!
Everyone has to evacuate the deck. Maggie and Jeff assure me it's not my fault...probably. My cursed life continues.
The veterans of LOIN and IFFL relax and enjoy themselves sitting in the sun, periodically checking on the games and giving each other shit.
The newbies (Steve, Shelly, and I) alternate playing cool in front of our opponents and dashing to the laptops to check our scores, always lamenting our under performers.
"STOP WHINING" is the consensus amongst the vets.
Each of us have what we believe are legitimate concerns.
Two of Shelly's receivers have laid goose eggs.
Steve's bench is out performing his actives by a factor of 2.
And I have the only Chicago running back in history who can seem to get down the fucking field!
Nevermind the Seahawks crush the Bucs! (Thank God, Shaun gets that TD!)
Nevermind all the fish kabobs and pasta salad!
We're frantically doing mental arithmetic every play.
Sad.
Beyond sad, really.
Who's idea was this FF stuff, anyway?
Mercifully, T.O. and Romo rescue me from a 40 point deficit. It's now Shelly's turn to sweat.
Maggie and Jeff finally get rid of us after the late game. Still whining, btw.
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1 comment:
Dang - I know you were there but I swear I didn't see you. You've been to two games - either I need new glasses or you should stand right in front of me. Seriously push people out of the way... Enjoy Blue Thunder right up and personal - okay maybe not that close! Go Hawks!
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