Tool

Etymology
Old English tōl

Noun
Singular
tool
Plural
tools

tool
-A mechanical device intended to make a task easier.
-Equipment used in a profession, e.g., tools of the trade.
-(slang) A complete idiot.
-(slang) Penis.
-(slang) A person who uncritically supports and assists established authority. See sellout.
-(slang) By association, any contemptible, inadequate, or unpleasant person.
-(slang) A person who is used in relationships for reasons other than love.

Goddamnit! Fucking figure it out! TOOL TOOL TOOL!

Can't say this at work. Can't say this to someone who I have to ask to cover me when I'm gone snowboarding. There are alot of people that are in serious trouble if I'm diagnosed with terminal cancer. Their only hope is that I will be so concerned about myself that I'll forget about choking the shit out of them. If they are banking on me having an epiphany or gaining a deeper understanding when sqaurely faced with my own mortality or some shit like that they are likely to be unpleasantly surprised.